Living the expat lifestyle

I arrived in Abuja at 4pm, on Thursday 15th September and was to meet a good friend (Hana) from the first year of my Masters degree, who now works for UNICEF in the capital of Nigeria. Our meeting point was the Rockview Hotel a brand new sleek, monstrosity of a hotel with atrocious wealth seeping from every marble slab.

As I waited (I had come from Zaria and was about an hour early) in the lobby, politicians and their civil servants came and went talking loudly about their up-coming meeting as if wanting the others in the lobby to hear. Yoruba and Hausa business men and women loitered in big groups around the reception. Glamorous Nigerian women followed hotel staff carrying their European designer bags. This opulence in a land of want was to characterise my long weekend in Abuja, my expat weekend in Abuja.

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I have a problem with expats, particularly those in Africa. My vision of expats, is that they are white, live in gated isolation, have a pathological fear of the locals and have every need, from clothes washing to door opening, provided by poor, black Africans who’s working conditions represent anything but a dignified one. I see expats as the frontline representatives of the aggressive, neo-colonial globalisation, which is currently eyeing Africa – much as at the “Scramble for Africa” Berlin conference did in 1884 – for the use of its vast resources for the development of anyone but the African poor majority.

Whenever I meet expats, however, they have a tendency to smash my prejudices.

They are the most interesting people you are likely to meet. Lively and extravagant, they are also welcoming and treat people with respect. They come from all political persuasions and from a huge range of nationalities. They are aware of the rash perceptions that people (like me) make of them and manoeuvre accordingly, being humble (as much as possible with that kind of wealth), reflective and thoughtful.

All-in-all I like them, despite the fact that my conception of expats in Africa remains valid, if needing to be qualified.

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Opposite the Rockview Hotel resides Hana. She lives in a glorious 4-bedroom, 3rd floor flat with one other (Sarah, who also works with UNICEF). The flat has breathtaking views over Abuja.

Abuja has been the federal capital since 1991 and everything has been built since 1976, when plans for Abuja were approved. Abuja lies in the geographical centre of Nigeria and was also chosen because of its ethnic neutrality – a site, unlike the previous capital, Lagos, which was dominated by one of the big three ethnic groups. Its youth endows Abuja with modern buildings, wide clean roads and spacious parks.

From Hana’s flat you can see Aso Rock under which the Federal buildings sit – all short distances from each other replicating the model of Washington DC – and the other symbol of Abuja’s power, the NICON Hilton Hotel. The NICON is owned by the Nigerian government and run by Hilton International. It is West Africa’s largest hotel and the busiest hotel in the whole of Africa.

I stayed for the weekend in this wonderful flat and this rich city (where the poor live in the outer-suburbs and come in only to work).

Over this weekend, I enjoyed the mainstays of being an expat during my short stay: privileged access to places; parties; and comfortable day trips.

Privileged Access

On the first full day there I toured Abuja’s sparse tourist sights with Lucas (a Dutch ex-diplomatic officer, Sarah’s partner and also temporarily crashing at The Flat). The sights include the central mosque – a large golden domed, four-minarette building that dominates the skyline of Abuja as it sit on a heightened spot. The equally massive national Pentecostal church, sitting opposite to the Mosque, will, in the future, also be an interesting sight. Currently, it has hundreds of workers clambering all over it (mainly putting bright copper tiles over the angled roof), rushing to get the building completed for the 2nd October planned service. And we visited the Federal Buildings, also known as the Three Arms zone – the House of Representatives, Supreme Court and President’s Complex (commonly known simply as the villa) each an arm of Federal Administration.

On visiting the House of Representatives we were able to blag our way in (the second coup of the holiday after the Emir’s palace in Kano). As we approached the building, there were politicians, civil servants and clerks coming in and out, using the large, shaded veranda as an important place to do business, to cement new relationships and conspire against old ones. We were quizzed firmly by the female guard about our intention and who we were there to see. Lucas pulled out the trump card, his Diplomatic Passport, and came up with something about seeing an Assembly Clerk.

We were waived in, despite our conspicuous travel outfit – shorts, sandals, scruffy shirt and camera bag over shoulder. Such ease of entry would never happen to an equally dressed Nigerian.

Once we were in, however, there was nothing to do and a fairly bland interior, so we just walked around pretending to looking important and hoping to accidentally stumble upon something interesting – it never happened and the best thing we found was a scrappy photo exhibition where Lucas could point out some of the big shots in Nigerian politics.

Parties

Hana was invited to four parties over Friday and Saturday. We went to all of them.

A couple of parties were with a largely VSO crowd – these young people, committed to the best ideals of international cooperation and development, are not what I call expats. There parties were still very expat-like.

One, a leaving party for a volunteer from America, was in a bar given the Disney-esque name “Leisure Castle”. A fantastic spread was put on, but the music was horrendously loud. The other one was at an Irish construction compound (a bit Auf Wiedersehen Pet, but in Nigeria, not Germany, and instead of Geordies, they’re all Irish) and the highlight was the available pool table.

Whilst VSO’s were very approving and sympathetic to the idea of travelling around Nigeria, often asking for travel tips, the true expats – people paid a lot – were usually baffled and became animated about how Nigeria is the last desirable travel destination. The more animated they became, the more emphatically they would conclude how much they love Nigeria.

I met large group of expats at a party hosted by Sarah and Lucas back at The Flat, which we went to after the music at the Leisure Castle had exhausted us. This was expats at there best: good conversation, diverse and good drinkers.

The most bizarre party, however, was the American Marine party. The party was held in an enormous house, where the ground floor had been converted into a bar devoid of any atmosphere. The difficult entrance for Hana, Megumi (a Japanese embassy officer) and I, set a tone of American paranoia – we had to show some ID, and fortunately Megumi has her embassy card on her.

Upon entrance we had to buy a N500 (about £2) token for use at the bar – fortunately the drinks were cheap at N150 a pop. As we made our way through the whitewashed corridor and into the whitewashed room with a smattering of plastic garden furniture scattered around, there were young drink Americans playing darts, bizarrely, and a more internationally mixed group of expats propping up the bar. The light conversation moved from the dire to the terrible.

Hana and Megumi quickly avoided any strangers and got chatting to their good friend, JC, a Frenchman – a likable, amusing character that had joined us for a picnic earlier in the day.

I was left stranded with a sarcastic Brit (Fred, a relative newcomer to Nigeria, who also was at the picnic and earned my respect early on for the evident no-nonsense respect he had for Nigerians) and a serious American.

Instead of looking baffled at my announcement that I was travelling around Nigeria, the American bellowed, “why don’t you visit America?” I was caught off-guard by this rather odd response. Fred intervened: “shall I give you a list?” The American frowned, “what do you mean?”

“Well, Americans for a start”, Fred said with sarcastic smile.

The joke fell flat and an uncomfortable silence ensued. The American aghast, I intervened and diplomatically said, “I’ve been to America a couple of times before, so…”, walked off and got pointlessly drunk. I spent the rest of the evening surrounded by this mismatch of people, stumbling between conversations. As a memento I bought an 'American Marines in Nigeria' polo shirt!

Day trips

The highlight of the weekend was to two day trips organised by Hana and friends. On Saturday we went to the immense Gurara Falls and on Sunday to the serene Bwari Pottery village.

At Gurara falls, six of us headed to Niger State to visit this wide rapid waterfall off the beaten track. The site of the falls gave us picnic facilitates, which were also being used for an office party (who had brought there own generator and were blasting out some RnB grooves), and some pleasant downstream walks. A rugged little trek, that Fred and I struggled with (Fred hit his head and slipped into the water at one point), rewarded us with fantastic views of the waterfall and the surrounding lush vegetation.

Better, though, was Bwari village. Hana, Megumi, Bruno (Italian) and I went to visit this small pottery production village, originally set up by an Englishman (Michael O’Brien) who learnt his pottery craft in Japan. Whilst the Englishman returns on a regular basis, a Nigerian (Stephen Mhya) is the lead artist (his work is to be exhibited in Belgium and France this year), tour guide, salesman and consummate host.

We enjoyed his hospitality to the full. As prearranged by Megumi, Stephen had set up a log barbeque for us and reserved a beautiful shelter for us to sit under. The shelter, as all the buildings in the small pottery village, was made using traditional Nigerian techniques of mud and straw walls and a type of thatched roof. This technique is much more expensive that the more common buildings made of concrete walls and corrugated iron roofs, but it regulates the temperature beautifully and provided us with an idyllic place to enjoy our wood fired lamb, chicken and roasted vegetables.

Pure bliss!